Ernestine Eula Martin Cary, the widow of James Edward Cary Jr., and a native of Portsmouth and longtime resident of the city, died Jan. 28, 2025, after a period of declining health. She was 86.

Ernestine was born Aug. 1, 1938, to Ernest Dudley Martin and Margaret Hawley Martin. She was the youngest of six siblings and was a cradle-roll member of the former Park View Baptist Church in Portsmouth.

She graduated in 1956 from Woodrow Wilson High School, in the first graduating class at the "new" Wilson on Willett Drive. She attended the Richmond Professional Institute of the College of William & Mary, now Virginia Commonwealth University.

Ernestine and Jim met in 1956 at Park View, where she was singing in the choir and he was a U.S. Navy corpsman stationed at nearby Portsmouth Naval Hospital. After his first visit to the church, Jim returned to his quarters, called his mother in Illinois, and told her he had "seen" the girl he was going to marry – the redheaded young woman in the choir with the high voice.

They were wed on Aug. 17, 1957, at Park View. They would have three children: two girls and a boy.

Jim's duty stations took the family to Key West, Fla.; Philadelphia; Camp Lejeune, N.C.; and Pensacola, Fla. When Jim served as a combat medic in Vietnam in the 1960s, Ernestine and the children returned to Portsmouth, and the family eventually settled there.

Ernestine served her country first as a Navy wife, then as a civilian employee of the U.S. Coast Guard and the U.S. Navy. She retired in 1998 as a program analyst in the environmental quality division at the Naval Facilities Engineering Command in Norfolk.

Ernestine was known by many names. In addition to her given name, her family also called her "Mar," "Red," "Mom" and "Honey." A son-in-law combined the initials of those names into a new nickname, "Mermh."

To her grandson, she was "G-mo." To her granddaughter, she was "Grandma." To her great-granddaughters, she was "Double G-mo."

She was fiercely loyal to the things she loved: her church; her family; her memories of her husband and her parents; her Dallas Cowboys; and her Pepsi-Cola, which she called "Carolina water."

In addition to her husband, her parents and her siblings, she was preceded in death by her son, James Edward Cary III.

Ernestine is survived by her daughters, Cynthia Cary Anderson and her husband, Brice T. Anderson, of Portsmouth, and Kelly Cary Jobst and her husband, William E. Jobst, of Portsmouth; her grandson, James B. Anderson and his wife, Lauren Conners Anderson, and their daughters, Miller Walke Anderson, Bridget Kathryn Anderson and Maisie James Anderson, of Mechanicsville; and her granddaughter, Ryan Cary Metz and her husband, Trevor Ryan Metz, of Colorado Springs, Colo.

A celebration of life service will be held Saturday, Feb. 15, at Jackson Memorial Baptist Church, 4316 Bruce Road in Chesapeake. The family will receive friends at 11 a.m., and the service will begin at noon. A reception will follow the service in the church's fellowship hall.

In lieu of flowers, the family asks that memorial gifts be made to Emily Green Shores assisted living facility, 500 Westmoreland Ave., Portsmouth, VA  23707, ATTN: Ernestine Cary Memorial Fund.

Condolences may be registered with this obituary at www.BWFosterFuneralHome.com.